The Boys You Want VS The Boys You Need.

(photo credit : Elena Berezina) 

Let me tell you a story about the boys you want.

They are mysterious, have a dangerous appeal, a spice of melodrama and zest for fantasy.

Wonderland du jour and attention je ne sais quoi.

They make you feel like you want the world to stop, heck the world stops when you are with them.

The calls, damn the calls!

Incessant, over the edge, every moment affair.

You pour your hearts out on the phone, through texts, chats...

It is a drug, you can never get enough of the intoxication.

It is highend ecstasy borderline on molly heroine, morphine...

The love engulfs you, you love them till your breathing stops, you love them till they call the cops on you...

The love breeds madnees, you always want more but you never really get enough.

And then...

Reality sets in!

It is an illusion, there is a sudden awakening, a flash of lightning that jolts you back to consciousness.

 It comes fast, it ends faster.

And then...

You are in pain, the reverse of everything you once felt in a good way.



Let me tell you a story about the boys you need.

They are realistic, genteel, they build walls but good bricked straight forward walls.

They do not lead you on, they don't commit until they are sure about what they really feel.

They appear like they never care because they are tactical and practical.

 You want it now, you want it fast but they believe in the natural state of things.

They study you, they understand you, they watch you.

They believe in growth so they take their time because they know that they have time.

They might not have it all, they might not have life figured out yet but they are on track, they are on course, they are on the move.

You want the calls always, the texts, the chats, the talking until there is nothing else to talk about...

But it trickles in, until it forms a puddle, a river, an ocean...

Unbeknownst to you, you have formed the major thing first-- friendship.

You have formed a solid foundation and then everything else is glorious.

You learn important lessons with the boys you need, you talk about books, great taste in music, you see the world in clear perspectives, you make healthy arguments, you are always the best version of yourself.

You give.
You receive.

Rinse and Repeat.

Above all, you understand the value of time, the virtue of patience. The importance of chasing value and not 'cheap' thrills.

You master the art of genuine care and love.

You don't hurt, you never hurt.

You learn, you grow, you flourish.


These two are like a balance, but sadly the first tips the other over.

It might boil down to what you always want but the truth is, do you really need it?